Cats & Air Conditioning

Since my two cats are strictly indoors, I do what I can to bring the outdoors in. One way of doing this is by opening the windows and allowing the house to fill with breezes.

This is no small task. I live in a 98-year-old home and to open a window requires that I slide open the storm window, unlock and push OUT the window frame (sometimes propping them open with sticks as the tightening mechanism to keep them open stopped working long ago), and pull the screen back down. Except some newer windows do open up. However, these too must be propped open with sticks b/c I live in constant fear of one of them being shaken loose and coming slamming down on a cat's head.

The point being, to open the downstairs windows is a good 10 minute process. But the health of my babies is worth it.

I open all the windows, get a nice cross breeze going, then search for the cats. Where are they? That's right, upstairs in the air conditioning. I march up the stairs.

"Hey!" I announce to two sleeping cats who jump at the sound of my voice. "Fresh air downstairs. Hustle."

The cats look at each other, shrug, and roll back over to go asleep.

"Oh no," I say, picking them up. I carry them downstairs and place each in front of a window. "There. Isn't that better? Smell the fresh air?"

The cats look longingly toward the stairs.

"Look, a bird!" I say. "See the pretty birdie."

The overweight cat is perspiring. The kitten tries to fan herself.

"You two are pathetic," I say. "But suit yourselves."

I stand back and the cats warily cross my path, ready to run at any sudden movement. But I stand still and they trot happily back upstairs. Happy that is, until evening when I move to close the windows. Then World War III starts up.

"Mow, meow" they wail as I close the windows. They paw pathetically at the glass. "Me-ooooow."

"Stuff it," I tell them. "You had your chance."

For those of you who have kids, tell me. Does it ever get any easier???