Cats & Air Conditioning

Since my two cats are strictly indoors, I do what I can to bring the outdoors in. One way of doing this is by opening the windows and allowing the house to fill with breezes.

This is no small task. I live in a 98-year-old home and to open a window requires that I slide open the storm window, unlock and push OUT the window frame (sometimes propping them open with sticks as the tightening mechanism to keep them open stopped working long ago), and pull the screen back down. Except some newer windows do open up. However, these too must be propped open with sticks b/c I live in constant fear of one of them being shaken loose and coming slamming down on a cat's head.

The point being, to open the downstairs windows is a good 10 minute process. But the health of my babies is worth it.

I open all the windows, get a nice cross breeze going, then search for the cats. Where are they? That's right, upstairs in the air conditioning. I march up the stairs.

"Hey!" I announce to two sleeping cats who jump at the sound of my voice. "Fresh air downstairs. Hustle."

The cats look at each other, shrug, and roll back over to go asleep.

"Oh no," I say, picking them up. I carry them downstairs and place each in front of a window. "There. Isn't that better? Smell the fresh air?"

The cats look longingly toward the stairs.

"Look, a bird!" I say. "See the pretty birdie."

The overweight cat is perspiring. The kitten tries to fan herself.

"You two are pathetic," I say. "But suit yourselves."

I stand back and the cats warily cross my path, ready to run at any sudden movement. But I stand still and they trot happily back upstairs. Happy that is, until evening when I move to close the windows. Then World War III starts up.

"Mow, meow" they wail as I close the windows. They paw pathetically at the glass. "Me-ooooow."

"Stuff it," I tell them. "You had your chance."

For those of you who have kids, tell me. Does it ever get any easier???

Book Promotion

Preparing Saturday's speech took quite a bit of wind out of my sails. I have a million projects going on (yes, that's right, a full million. I counted. Don't question me) and preparing the speech set me back several days.

BUT, it was good promo time. One of the points in my speech on Establishing Yourself As A Professional Speaker was that you never, while starting out, turn down an opportunity to speak. And aside from speaking and gaining exposure, I got to tell 30 people about my book, and complete a Toastmasters Advanced Speech to boot.

I received an e-mail this morning asking me to do another speech. A woman from a business woman's group I spoke to last summer wants me to come speak to another group she belongs to. She's pre-booking dates from August to June of 2006.

It's just wrong to know 12 months in advance what your schedule is for next year. But I'm moving more and more in that direction. Most conferences book their speakers 1-2 years out. I'm applying now to speak at writer's conferences in 2006 and 2007. Let's hope the writing career steps up a notch between now and then, shall we? =)

The Decorating Diaries - Drama

God help us, we've decided to give it another go. Decorating our bedroom that is. For those longtime fans of the Dena & Blair bedroom decorating diaries, you'll recall that our awesome duo have been trying to create a snug, restful sleeping abode for the past 9 years. And yet, they haven't quite made it yet. Let's stop here to review some of the highlights of their journey.

Airsick China Man Look
After reviewing photos in Architectural Digest and a color wheel at Sherwin Williams, Dena feels she has a grip on the whole color scheme and decides to decorate the bedroom in a palate of reds and golds. She paints the walls a Grand Canyon yellow, convinces Blair red carpeting is the way to go and calls it a day. The result? It looks like a China man threw up on their walls and flooring. With a little tweaking, the color combo would also be effective in a whorehouse.

Neutral Nights
Deciding color was a bad, bad idea, the duo run to Home Depot, grab the first 5 cans of off-white paint they see and throw it on the walls. Now we have white walls, cream trim, and pinkish-red carpet (the many tears cried over it for the sheer ugliness of it faded it out a bit). They live with this for almost a year.

Green Getaway
Agreeing they need help, our duo consult a decorator and allow themselves to be convinced green is the color for them, ignoring the fact that most shades of green make Dena want to puke. So they surround themselves with pale green walls, deep green floral bedspread with matching bedskirt, and a purple and green chair. However, ever the cheapskate, Dena refuses to spend money on new furniture and goes with the "garage sale/parent's basement/great find on the side of the street" look. The end result? Even the cats are scared to enter the room.

Orange Oasis
Yes, orange. Frankly, it's the best of the looks so far and the one currently on the walls. Blair was on a 5-day trip and Dena decided the green had to go so she brought home 3 shades of orange, discarded the Salmon and the Pumpkin, stuck with the deep coral, and surprised Blair when he came home. Pluses: the warm tone makes skin look alive and vibrant vs. the chalky death mask look of living in the green. Minuses: It's an orange room, for God's sake.

Can This Couple Be Saved?... We think so. Our hearty duo is working with yet another decorator, returning to their first love of reds and yellows but in muted tones and done with elegance and understatement...we hope.

Stay tuned for the ongoing woes found in DECORATING DRAMA.

Successful Speech

My speech was a success. I didn't include everything I meant to but that's the beauty of public speaking - no one knows that but me. I'm happy to have it behind me though. I have so much work to do my head is spinning and I don't know which way is up. 5 articles coming due (4 of which still need researched), a new class I'm teaching in July on Magazine Writing that I still have to pull the syllabus and materials together for, marketing follow-up, I'm looking to move my blogs to a new forum (squarespace.com) and need to investigate how that might work, I've ignored my public speaking book--supposedly a priority--for close to a month now, and I've got a towering pile of memos and scraps of paper and "to be read" material teetering on the edge of my desk that threatens to topple over and smother the cats.

I've got ideas for 2 new articles which is a joke at the moment as I can't handle what's on my plate. I had to tell my best friend not to come for a visit this weekend just b/c I'm so behind.

It's difficult to judge how drastic the situation is though. I'm not happy unless I'm operating 2 weeks ahead of schedule. I like lots of leeway in case something goes horribly awry. It almost never does, but I like the cushion. So I'm not really behind at this point. I'm more on schedule which to me feels way behind. (Except for not having anything ready for that class. Yeah, I'm screwing myself on that).

Lots more to talk about. I'll use a separate post to start the decorating drama theme.