Smug Marrieds: Worst Cat Mommy EVER

I'm not sure how I'm going to live with the guilt.

Yesterday was beautiful weather, so I opened the back door to let in some fresh air. Blair screened in our back porch a couple of years ago and sometimes the cats like to sit out there. 

About 7:30 last night, as it was getting dark, I looked on the porch to make sure there were no cats out there and then closed the door for the night. I went to the front of the house to do some work and then settled in front of the TV at 9 pm to watch Modern Family. Blair got home about 9:15 and we watched TV together until 10. 

It was a little after 10 and I had just gotten into bed when I heard the back door rattle open and Blair saying, "Come on in, baby," then calling out, "Why is there a kitty on the porch??"

I had apparently locked Olivia on the back screen porch, in the dark and chill, for over 3 hours. Blair heard her pitiful little meow's through the door. Oh. My. God. The guilt. 

I was in bed and Blair came and stood in the doorway and glared at me. 

"I am SO SORRY," I said. "I would have sworn there were no cats on that porch when I closed the door."

Blair crossed his arms. 

"I feel terrible," I said. "Poor kitty."

More staring. 

"Do you think she's scarred for life?" I asked. "Do you think she hates me?"


He was just teasing and reassurred me she was no worse for the wear, but I do feel terrible. I would have gone to bed and left her out there all night in the dark and cold. Bad cat mommy! Bad! 

About 10 minutes later, Olivia jumped on the bed and settled into her normal spot on top of my stomach so that I could pet her. As I scratched her ears and belly I murmured apologies. "Mommy's going to give you tuna tomorrow, yes she is. And we'll give you a whole hour of combing, won't we? Yes we will. Whatever the baby wants, baby can have..."

"Seriously, she's fine," came Blair's voice out of the dark. "Can we just go to sleep now?" 

"And Mommy will buy you a car if you want one," I continued. "Yes I will. Poor little abandoned kitty." 

"If I let you lock me on the back porch for an hour, will you feel guilty enough that you'll be quiet so I can go to sleep?" asked Blair. 

"Maybe," I said. "We could at least try the locking out part and see where that gets us."

Never a dull moment in the Harris house.