I promised you a car story so here it is.
Two days ago I'm driving my Saturn station wagon home from yoga and all is good. I pull up to the house and turn off the car, but as I go to lock the door, I notice something odd about the locks. They are simple push button locks with the "Lock" button on top and the "Unlock" button below, but now both buttons appear to be almost recessed, like they've half caved into the door. I press the "Lock" button and the whole car shimmys as the locks on all four doors start to rattle in a rising hum. Click-click-click-click-click-click-click-click. I'm surrounded by the noise.
So I press "Unlock." Now the locks are actually vibrating in the door - ack-ack-ack-ack-rurh-rurh-rurh-ack-ack-rurh-rurh. Very scary noises are coming from the locks. Plus, the locks in all four doors are doing this so it feels like the car is possessed with someone shaking and rattling all the doors. Naturally, I got the hell out of there.
Later that night I inform Blair the car is possessed. Or broken. Whatever.
"I'll drive it to the dealership, you follow," he says and hops in my car and takes off. I can never get out of the house as fast as he can, having to track down shoes, wallet, and pet the cats at least once before I go. But no big deal because he'll need a little bit of time to write out the night-drop ticket.
So about 5 minutes later I follow. As I pull up to the closed service door, I notice Blair just sitting in the Saturn. I get out and as I walk toward him I hear the locks rattling and humming and doing their little dance. I grin at him through the window.
"Locked in?" I ask through the glass.
"Yes," he answers.
"Mmmm. Bummer." The car continues to rattle and hum.
"Would you unlock the door?" he asks, motioning to the keys I hold.
I look hurt. "You didn't say 'please.'"
He then gave me a look that made me unlock the door in a hurry.
Anyway, the dealership called yesterday and it's no big deal - something like $50 to repair which I don't know for sure but is probably cheaper than an exorcism.
I missed my chance though. Blair locked in the car would have been a prime time to negotiate for a third cat. Maybe with luck the Lexus will become possessed next and I can try again.