I need a pair of black flats.

That statement is enough to send me into a tailspin of almost non-recoverable depression.

I hate shopping. I especially hate shoe shopping. And I especially especially hate shopping for black flats which are like the little black dress in that the right pair is supposed to carry you through any occasion, except I keep getting it wrong. (Hence, the hate.)

I currently own 3 pairs of black flats. One is an el-cheapo pair I convinced myself could pass for a higher end shoe but which scream out "Payless shoe sale! Payless shoe sale!" with each cheap pleather step.