Dating Diaries: What It Takes To Be My Boyfriend

Recently, a friend jokingly said something to me like, “So, how many boyfriends have you gone through this year?

First of all—ouch. Second of all, with full respect to the men I’ve dated, my answer to that question would probably be, "Zero."That’s not to say I haven’t dated and that I haven’t been in “we’re only seeing each other” relationships. It’s just that I’ve thought of most of these men as “the person I’m dating,” versus “my boyfriend.” Which led me to wonder… what is the threshold for someone to cross over into “boyfriend” territory?

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Winning the Divorce

About four months after B. and I separated, he asked if I could meet him for dinner. He had some news. The "news" was that he would more or less be living in Paris for the next 12-24 months, overseeing a European company purchase made by his company.  For anyone not in the know, B. and I parted on excellent terms and have remained friends. I was thrilled for him, but couldn’t resist a small tease.

“So you’re saying that if I had hung on for four more months, I could be a freelance writer living in Paris?” I asked.

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Dating Diaries: First Date Agenda

Lots of people go on a date with a hidden agenda—inspire passion; find a spouse; score a free meal, but how many women are actually provided with an outlined agenda for how a date will proceed?

Digging through old emails, I found this gem. This came from an intelligent and witty PhD that I met one night when I was out with girlfriends. We had mutual friends in common and he was writing a book. He got my email by asking if I’d be willing to read...

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Dating Diaries: “I Had Another Crier”

My friend J. is also doing the online dating thing. He emailed the other day to share a long and disturbing story of a woman who just started sobbing in the middle of dinner on their first date. We decided she was either mentally unbalanced or—and kudos to her if this was it—she was executing a clever ploy to excuse herself from the date.

We both kind of wrote it off as “Huh. Whatever.” moment. Then J. texted me yesterday:

J: I had another crier! This one broke down and said "I just love the Bible and Jesus so much..." in between sobs...

Me: Oh. My. God. How are you attracting these women?? You really need to refine your screening process.

 J: I know! I guess I could put a clause that says: if you think you were born more than once, swipe left! This one waited until I'd bought her two sushi dinners before she went New Testament on my ass.

Uh, ladies? Breaking into sobs on a date may indicate—and this is just a hunch but hear me out—that you are perhaps not ready to date.

Think about it.