Dharma & Greg and Too Many Eggs?

I had the most frightening experience tonight.  Have you ever seen the TV sitcom called Dharma & Greg? It was cancelled I don't know how many moons ago and started Jenna Elfman as a spacy new age type woman married to a Republican lawyer.  I never watched the show while it ran. But for some reason, flipping through channels tonight, I found an episode of it and decided to watch.  And it wasn't good.  But it was a "To Be Continued..." episode and darn if the continuation didn't come on right after it.  So I watched that.  Only it was a "To Be Continued..." episode and Dharma & Greg were in a terrible car wreck so I tuned in to make sure everything was okay.  So I spent an hour and half of my precious time on this Earth watching 3 poorly written and badly acted "Dharma & Greg episodes."  Isn't there some sort of AA program for people like me with these sort of fixation addictions? Very, very frightening.

I think it was because of the eggs.  I ate way too many eggs today.  We had a dozen  plus eggs set to expire at the end of this week so yesterday I made egg salad (8 eggs) and also a salmon-cheddar bake (6 eggs).   I had some egg salad for lunch and the salmon bake for dinner.  That's a whole lotta eggs.   I still have a lot of both left over but I don't think I'll feel like eating either tomorrow.

And Blair can't eat them.  Poor guy is still sick and actually came home from the office today.  That's like a sign of the Apocalypse.  Blair is 38 and has NEVER missed a day of work.  N-E-V-E-R.  He's occasionally acquiesced to come home early if he wasn't feeling well, "early" meaning 3 or 4  in the afternoon. And he technically didn't miss work today because he left the house at 7, drove 40 minutes, managed to stay upright at his desk for about an hour, then drove home.  He's been in bed all day.  And unlike me, who is all about the pampering when I'm sick (didn't see that one coming, did you?), Blair just wants to be left alone.  Which makes it both easy and hard to care for him.

Maybe I'll roll the TV in there and see if any episode of Dharma & Greg will cheer him up.  Couldn't hurt? 

WalMart is Wal-Boring

And now for a lighter change of pace...

I can tell a lead a rural existence because folks in these here parts, including myself, have been mighty excited these past few months as we've anticipated the grand opening of the Super WalMart, just a town over from where I live.  I've been counting down the days not because I'm a huge WalMart fan (Target is my discount store of choice), but because I looked forward to no longer needing to drive the 25 minutes we currently do to our grocery store.  Fresh fruits and vegetables and anything remotely resembling a soy-burger product is not to be found in my little town, so we make the hike to a Lowe's Foods in Oak Ridge every Sunday.

So it was with baited breath that I drove the 8 miles this morning to the newly opened Wal-Mart.  Even the bored looking greeting girl couldn't dissuade me.  WalMart is huge!  I couldn't wait to see all the new vegetarian products on the market that I probably didn't even know about. I grabbed a shopping cart big enough to tote around four full-grown men and headed into the aisles.

My first inkling something was off was in the fruit and veggie aisle.  While the produce looked good, there wasn't as much of it as I thought there would be.  Like all Americans, I like to pick over and reject approximately 200 of the same item before finding the one green or red bell pepper that meets my standards.  But I found it odd that there was only pre-packaged celery and the green onions came in a reusable zip-lock bag.

Then there were the concrete floors.  I know it's a cost-saving measure, but yecch.  Depressing is the best word to describe the aesthetics.  

But the real shocker came when I moseyed up to the frozen food aisle, ready to be amazed at the vegetarian smorgasbord that surely awaited me.  Instead, I found a few packages of Morning Star grillers and some Boca Burger products.  Adequate, but less of an offering than what was at my old store.  

I'm not willing to render a final verdict just yet.  Certainly the Oak Ridge Lowes store is nicer looking with a better array of products.  But WalMart's 6-minute drive still holds a strong appeal.  I suspect we'll mix it up a bit, depending on our shopping needs for the week.

And that concludes this week's essay on "Wish You Were Here: Small Town Life in North Carolina."  Join us next week as I explore the controversial topic of "Front Porch Couches: Fashion Statement or Decorator Dilemma?"

Professional Redemption

Two things.  First, I received an e-mail from PMA this morning congratulating me on having Lessons In Stalking ACCEPTED for trade distribution to national book stores through their program.  Of course! I thought.  The rejection had been a misunderstanding.  A silly mistake I'll laugh about with the hosts of Good Morning America as my book picks up speed and I go on my national tour. What good PR this will bring!

Then two e-mails down was another e-mail from PMA, apologizing for the "incorrect e-mail regarding your acceptance status" in the trade distribution program.  They "apologize for any inconvenience this may have caused" me.  Hmmm.  The next time those of you reading this blog see me, could you do me a favor?  Would you mind checking my back to see if someone has taped a "KICK ME" sign there while I wasn't looking?

I do have good news, however.  I was accepted by the American Society of Journalists and Authors (ASJA) which does hold a small amount of prestige.  So "nyeh, nyeh, nyeh" to PMA.

I've been rather gloomy for some time now over my work.  Nothing in particular, just a "not satisfied" feeling in general with life.  I try my hardest to ignore this feeling because history reveals that following this feeling almost always leads to a drastic cut in monetary benefit to our household. 

My first "not satisfied" feeling led me to quitting my full-time job in 1998 and earning my Masters in Library Science.  I worked for a year as a database librarian and loved my job and co-workers but the "not satisfied" feeling crept back in and circumstances allowed me to quit so I travelled and goofed off for 6 months.  You would think that would be every person's dream, but  "Not satisfied" knocked again  so I went to work part-time at the Women's Resource Center and started writing part-time.  Then, (guess who!) "Not satisfied" came a calling and I quit my job to write full-time.  Now that I'm actually earning money with writing...take a guess.  Wow, you're good.  Yes, "Not satisfied" has decided to visit again.

Here is what I think.  I don't think "Not satisfied" really has much to do with the actual work I'm involved in.  I think I'm lacking a deeper foundation, a spiritual base, which is harboring this "not satisfied" feeling.  Work and recognition and all that is a fine thing, but I know there's a deeper purpose for being on this planet.  I used to belong to a spiritual group I enjoyed very much because it gave perspective to life.  These day-to-day "Oh I got accepted/rejected by PMA" are the side shows, not the main event.  But the group I belonged to was moving in a direction I didn't care for, so I dropped it.  That's been over 5 years ago and I haven't yet found anything to replace it. 

I'm not a church person.  And I think churches are very good things for many people.  But for me, spirituality is an exploration, and I prefer discussion, questioning, raising doubts and finding your own answers--something I haven't seen as being popular in most churches.  

Some of it is just laziness.  I've been saying I'm going to attend a meeting at a Quaker church in GSO for some time because I've heard wonderful things about this particular church.  But it's a 45-minute drive there and back which eats up my Sunday and blah, blah, blah, excuse, excuse, excuse.   I'm holding to that "when the student is ready, the teacher will appear" philosophy, as that's pretty much how I found my first group which brought so much to my life.  But I also think "God helps those who help themselves," so I need to be proactive in seeking things out.

But I do think the reason for my discontent isn't that I'm unhappy with work.  I love what I do.  I think it's just feeling off-balance in life. 

Headline: Friends Chase Self-Doubt Away

I'm in a far better mood.  Here's why:

1. I'm stuffed full of Chinese food.  Chinese food makes everything better.
2. My bathroom floor is smokin' hot, baby.  We're at a toasty 70 degrees.  The room is still full of dust but I walk in just to feel the heat.
3. My friends are awesome.  Bernie and Stevii posted on my site, Melody went so  far as to call and check in on me and several others sent e-mails. My favorite was from Michael, who came up with lewd and derogatory names for the PMA acronym  that I won't list here in case small children are reading.  But cheered me immensely to read them.
4. Blair is feeling better (he's had bronchitis this week) and we actually spent some time together tonight.  I've missed my sweetie.

Chinese food, heat, sarcastic humor and hugs.  When you put it all together, I'm just a simple woman with simple needs.